Are you struggling with stress, anxiety overwhelm or other mental health issues?

Are you struggling with stress, anxiety overwhelm or other mental health issues?

If so, you are going through what an ever-increasing number of other dentists are experiencing too.

The purpose of this blog is to reassure and inspire you that you can and will get through it. There are approaches that will make it easier for you.

As you read on you may think “Thank goodness someone I can relate to,” or “she is oversharing” whatever your response is, I know that it is appropriate for where you are now. What I share is the truth.

In retrospect I have probably suffered with mental health issues for most of my life. I saw my first therapist when I was about five because I demonstrated self- harming behaviours, I used to pull my hair out in huge clumps. I enjoyed seeing Dr Lindsay, my therapist, as even for a five-year old, therapy was an oasis of calm in my week. As I grew up things became generally manageable, until the first week I was at Uni. My day died suddenly on the first Sunday and my mum made it clear that she did not want me in the house then or ever. Returning to college, I spent much of my time blocking out the pain of loss, rejection and isolation; drinking heavily, over eating and by the end of the first year I was bulimic.

In the mid 80’s the law changed, and you were allowed to access your medical notes and I decided that I wanted to read mine from when I was five. I didn’t realise that I didn’t have the right to read past notes and the clinic said that they would talk through the reasons why I was seen initially and could have some therapy if any of the issues still remained. I should have left well alone, that process stirred up a hornet’s nest of emotions and the therapy rather than making it better made it far worse. My experiences were bad the first time and the therapy kept on putting me back into the situations without any coping strategies, I deteriorated.

Ultimately, I was signed off for depression three times during my times as a dental student. I got through and with my childhood dream of gaining BDS, the world was my oyster.

That was until my first post VT (that’s how old I am) associate job, that the anguish recurred. Initially a fully NHS book that I converted with only 18-months postgrad experience, lack of equipment (we often didn’t have any radiograph films and much more besides), no support or communication from the principal, no practice wide systems or processes and definitely no staff meetings. I should have paid attention when the outgoing associate told me that he sat in a layby for ½ hour each day and cried before coming to work. The stress became too much as did the frustration that I could not care and treat my patients in the way I thought they deserved. I left and bought my own practice.

Out of the frying pan in to the fire. Hindsight is a wonderful thing.

I bought the practice without any understanding or appreciation that the skills that I needed as a practice principal were any different from those I needed as a skilled enthusiastic clinician. How wrong and arrogant I was.

If I was going to place implants I would have to enrol on courses and learn how to do it before placing any abutments. If I wanted to do ortho I would have to learn how to before starting any treatment. Yet I bought a practice, one of the most expensive purchases of my life, and I didn’t think to go on a course to learn any practice management or leadership skills first. My ignorance cost me dearly, in time, money, and stress. I abdicated the day to day responsibilities to my practice manager rather than delegating.  The outcome was that my manager successfully managed to siphon vast sums of the practice money into her account. By the time I realised, I was in massive debt, broke, my patient list had been undermined, and my team was demoralised. I was up a creek without a paddle and super stressed. I started to self-medicating with alcohol, food, and anger.

My bounce-back strategy set in and I invested in learning how to run a successful practice, all the important stuff that is not taught at dental school. It was a long, tough road, and we made it. Paid off the debts, rebuilt the team, and revived the patient list so that they were delighted with the care and treatment we provided. Everything was going well, and then; my long-term relationship ended very suddenly and out of the blue. I was devastated.

This time the food and drink did not help me cope and I was prescribed antidepressants. The dose my GP prescribed did not help numb the pain, so I gradually kept on increasing the dose, to no avail.

Until. . .

A friend asked me if I wanted to do a fire-walk. “Why not” I replied. That weekend changed my life. Yes, I did do the fire-walk within 3 hours of walking into the seminar. More importantly, the seminar introduced me to NLP (Neuro-linguistic programming). From that weekend I have never taken an antidepressant again, I know I wasn’t supposed to just stop taking them, yet I did, and I didn’t have any side effects. The weekend was my first step on the most exciting journey of my life. Within 8 weeks I started my NLP practitioner training, with 18 months I had completed my NLP master practitioner training and had qualified as an accredited coach.

NLP works. I know that some of you will say there are no studies to support that NLP works, and I agree. It is difficult to do long term peer reviewed double-blind studies when each client is treated as an individual and therefore the therapeutic approach is non-standardised. For all that I know NLP works. It has worked for me. It has achieved what years of conventional therapy couldn’t. Because of NLP I have repaired relationships that seemed irretrievable, changed my career and never use food or alcohol or medication to cope with mental anguish, because I no longer have any mental anguish.

Because of the dramatic improvements that NLP gave me in my practice, my physical and mental health, I am passionate about bringing the benefits to dentists and dentistry.

I use NLP in my coaching for different outcomes for my clients

ü  Business coaching, communication and sales skills

ü  Therapeutically.

Therapeutically I have worked with clients who have successfully overcome

ü  Phobias and fears

ü  Panic attacks, anxiety and overwhelm

ü  Depression, Bi-Polar

ü  Grief and trauma

ü  Lack of confidence

ü  Pain

ü  Medical conditions* such as diabetes, high blood pressure, eczema, MS, ME

ü  Addictions including

ü  Undesirable habits

ü  Under performance.

Many more besides

*I don’t make any claims to treat or cure patients with medical conditions, I do work with people who have either not had successful outcomes with a conventional allopathic medical approach or chose not to use it. The clients all report positive improvement or complete resolution of symptoms.

If you think there are areas of your personal or professional life that NLP call me.

07989 757 884

When I offer to help and serve, I do so because you matter.

When you accept or ask for help you have taken the first step to recovery.

Only when you are connected, can things get better.